I was attempting to worship today and something kept coming to my mind over and over. It wasn't a distraction, rather it was God continuing to remind me of something He wanted me to do. I had told a lie to a friend of mine and I needed to make it right. I had also spoken about someone with the wrong attitude and I needed to apologize for it.
I wanted to keep "worshiping"! I just wanted to keep singing that new worship song I like. I wanted to tell God how awesome, great, mighty, and majestic (any other commonly used adjective) He was, but I couldn't shake it.
The problem was that at the very beginning of my prayer time today I asked God to shape me. It was an innocent prayer and lacked profoundness, but nonetheless, effective.
Jesus says something so relevant to this in Matthew 5:23-24
“So if you are presenting a sacrifice ["worshiping"] at the altar in the Temple and you suddenly remember that someone has something against you, leave your sacrifice there at the altar. Go and be reconciled to that person. Then come and offer your sacrifice to God."
Ahh, there it is again. Make it right because your sacrifice means nothing without obedience. I think it has become our... my habit to sweep offenses small and great under the rug, step into our worship time, and pretend like God doesn't know that something is awry. This is a dangerous habit to get into! This is where empty self-fulfilling self-honoring dishonest worship begins.
And we wonder why our worship is dry... why we have lost our sensativity to the Spirit.
Leave your sacrifice! Go make it right!
God is using this to humble me, mold me, and shape me. I can't complain though because it was my prayer to begin with.
Father, thank you so much for valuing me enough to see that I am changed; that the empty self-fulfilling self-honoring dishonest worship stops in my life. Oh God, forgive me of my sin against my brothers and sisters. I am in dire need of You, because, on my own, I'm unfit to be called your son. Keep me Lord, even if it means that I am broken... Keep me. In Jesus' name, Amen.